Interact Positively With Your Spouse for a Happy Marriage….

Newly married couples are so easy to spot: their eyes gleam with love, their faces radiate happiness and they wear the most genuine smiles. The initial phase of being married is perhaps the best time of a relationship, when both partners are brimmed with passion and love for one another. They put their best foot forward to make the other happy and to incite more loving feelings from them.

But as their relationship ages, the passion fades and makes way for comfort and convenience. These qualities are not exactly undesirable. But couples who exhibit these qualities tend to behave in a manner that causes negative interactions among them. When a couple is married for too long, they stop doing things to please one another and they may also become insensitive over a period of time. Consequently, their relationships become more tensed and bitter and they engage in more arguments.

Arguments take its toll on relationships

Although arguments are not essentially unhealthy but frequent arguments, bickering and constant fights causes couples to become unhappy. When couples frequently engage in negative interactions, they begin to foster feelings of anger, resentment and irritation towards the other partner. Couples, who have 8 negative interactions out of 10, are said to head for divorce.

Staying happily married

For couples to stay married, they have to have more positive interactions than negative. But staying married is different from being happily married. Sure, having more positive interactions can be enough to prevent a marriage from falling apart. But, is it enough for the couple to be happy? The answer is no. There actually exists a formula which can keep a married couple happy.

If a married couple has 10 positive interactions out of 12, it is safe to say that both partners are happy with each other and in the relationship.

How to have more positive interactions

Conversations do not always go as planned. But there are certainly a lot of things married couples can do to build a foundation for future positive interactions.

If you have been married for a long time and want to diminish your arguments, here’s what you should do:

Appreciate your partner For whatever he/she does for you. Be grateful for their efforts and time spent to make you feel good.

Do something to make your partner feel good. Cook for him/her, take him/her on a drive or movie etc.

Take time out for your partner and have meaningful conversations. This will help you regain emotional with them.

Encourage your partner for the things they like to do or are good at. Become your partner’s support system, celebrate their achievements and console them through bad times.

Communicate effectively If you have a problem then tell that to your partner in a clear and polite fashion. Do not accuse or yell and always, always watch your tone.

Do not demean or disrespect your partner during an argument. Do not resort to calling names or insulting your partner even if he/she is as at fault.

Compliment your partner This can really boost your partner’s confidence and make him/her feel really good about you and your relationship.If you do these things, you will really witness a stark difference in your marriage. You will not only have frequent positive interactions but you might also rediscover the lost passion in your relationship.

Intimatematrimony is India’s pioneering online matrimonial service provider, offering best matchmaking services. With ample database of thousands of prospective brides’ and grooms’ matrimony profiles, we assist you to meet with potential life partners and build lifetime relationships.

More Visit :www.intimatematrimony.com

Church Wedding in Christian Matrimony

Wedding is the most auspicious and important occasion in a person's life which commemorates the mark of a new journey. This is the time when two indivuals, come together and vow to spend their lives together, as equals. Every religion has laid down a set of rules and tradition, according to which a marriage is supposed to begin and culminate. Christian Matrimony takes place in a Church. The house of God is spectacularly decorated with ambers of beautiful adornments, to celebrate the Marriage Ceremony held within it. Wedding in a Church is contingent upon the different sect to which the bride and groom belong. For example, a Marriage between roman catholics is slightly different as compared to marriage between protestants.

Christian Marriage Ceremony Christian Marriage in a Church begins with the bride and groom, standing in front of the Priest, appealing to the Lord Jesus Christ, to bless upon their marriage. In Christian Matrimony, rings are exchanged and vows are read to each other, following with the Priest deems them husband and wife. During the Marriage Ceremony, the couple take their vows and consequently bound their lives together by agreeing, "To take each other, in sickness and in health, till death do us apart."

Rituals in Christian Marriage Ceremony Prior to the Marriage Ceremony, the priest sits with the bride and groom, and discusses with them about the procedures and rituals that will be followed in the Church. For this purpose, the priest reads Scriptures from Bible, pertaining to marriage to enlighten the couple about its true meaning. In Christian Marriage Ceremony, the parents of the couple are always seated on the front, as a sign to discern their importance at the wedding. The groom always enters first in the Church. In a Christian Marriage ritual, the father of the bride brings her to the altar, and gives her hand to the groom. A brief reading from the Bible takes place, following which vows and rings are exchanged.

Legal Documents required for Church Wedding in Christian Matrimony Every Wedding needs to have the stamp of governmental approval, without which the marriage would stand void. In a Church Wedding in Christian Matrimony a copy of identity cards of both the bride and groom, copy of their baptism certificate, a copy of their birth certificates along with certificate of faith issued by the local government in the country of origin needs to be submitted.These documents need to have a validity of six months or more.

In conclusion, Weddings in Church are always pre booked and the date and time for the same is allotted by the priest of the Church, in accordance with availability and space of the Church. Church Wedding, in all its glory and grandeur, is the most wonderful experience in the lives of two individuals, who wish to enter the conjugal journey

Intimatematrimony is India's pioneering online matrimonial service provider, offering best matchmaking services. With ample database of thousands of prospective brides' and grooms' matrimony profiles, we assist you to meet with potential life partners and build lifetime relationships.

More Visit :www.intimatematrimony.com

10 Modern Myths About Wedding…

1. If I marry the “right person” we’ll always feel in love.

Our culture has fed us the myth that we all have a perfect “soulmate” out there and if we find him/her, our passionate feelings will never fade, our disagreements will be rare or nonexistent, we’ll both want to make love with each other constantly and every day in marriage will have fairy tale bliss. When we wake up one morning and don’t have those feelings, we start to assume we must have married the wrong person and need to get out and find our real “soulmate.” The truth is that strong marriages are built on commitment not compatibility. For more on this, check out my post on overcoming “incompatibility” in marriage.

2. If my spouse really loves me, he/she will be willing to change.

Some of the most frustrated people on earth are the ones who are in a marriage where they’re trying to “change” their spouse—or they’re in a marriage where their spouse is trying to change them! It’s exhausting and unnatural. It reduces the marriage to manipulation instead of love. Yes, both spouses will certainly have to make selfless adjustments for the marriage to thrive—but neither should do it at the expense of losing his or her identity in the process. Love brings out the best in us, but doesn’t change who we are. Remember, it’s never your job to “fix” or to “change” your spouse. It’s your job to love you spouse. Love is what truly changes us all.

3. My friends know me, so they are the best place to get marriage advice.

Nearly everyone in your life is going to offer you advice and share their opinions with you. We trust our friends, so we naturally assume their marriage advice is going to be solid, but the best advice is usually going to come from outside your peer group because your peers are dealing with the same stuff you’re dealing with. You need a mentor; not just a friend. You need to find advice and wisdom from someone is ahead of you and probably older than you. Find someone with the kind of marriage you hope to have twenty years from now and ask them for advice.

4. I still have a right to privacy (I don’t have to tell my husband/wife everything).

This one always tends to offend people, but it’s vital to a healthy marriage. Secrecy is the enemy of intimacy and if you want a healthy marriage, you have to have total transparency and trust. This means don’t keep secrets, hidden passwords, hidden money, hidden conversations or anything else your spouse doesn’t have full access to. The healthiest couples value transparency over privacy. They place their responsibility to their spouse ahead of their rights to privacy.

5. My parents raised me, so my loyalty to them should be stronger than my loyalty to my spouse.

We should always honor our parents, but when we do it at the expense of our marriage, we’ve created a toxic and dysfunctional dynamic. Your first loyalty must always be to your spouse. Practically speaking, this means you shouldn’t talk disrespectfully about your spouse and you shouldn’t allow anyone in your family to talk disrespectfully about him/her either. For more on healthy relationships and healthy boundaries, 

6. I should not have to tell my spouse what’s wrong, if he/she was paying attention, they would know.

One of the most common miscommunication traps in marriage happens with these unspoken assumptions. We think our nonverbal hints should be more than enough to get the message across—or we think the answer is so obvious that we shouldn’t have to say it out loud. When we fall into this trap, one spouse stays clueless and the other spouse stays frustrated. We need to communicate with consistency, clarity and transparency.

7. If I’m not sexually fulfilled in my marriage, as long as I don’t have an affair, I should be able to do anything I want to get my needs met.

Modern couples have adopted the destructive habit of “outsourcing” the sexual fulfillment in their marriage to outside sources like pornography or romance novels. In an attempt to enhance their own sexual gratification, they’re actually sabotaging the sexual intimacy of their marriage. When you replace your spouse with another person (virtually or physically), then you’re pursuing pleasure at the expense of your marriage. All your sexual energies, fantasies and desires should be focused on your spouse. Monogamy should be both physical and mental. It might sound impossible, but it’s not. 

8. Every couple is unique, so there’s not a single “right way” to have a good marriage.

This one is partially true, but it’s often the “almost true” things that prove to be more deceptive than obvious lies. Every couple is unique and there’s no cookie-cutter approach to marriage, but there are some timeless and universally-applicable principles that provide a compass to keep a marriage on course. To disregard these principles and write our own rules for love and marriage will lead to disaster. 

9. Our kids, need us so they should always come before our marriage.

If you’re a parent, I’m sure you’d be willing to give your life for your kids. Parenthood takes that kind of selfless concern for our kids, but I’ve seen too many couples be “marriage martyrs” by sacrificing their marriage on the altar of parenthood. The parents wrongly assume that total devotion to the kids requires putting the marriage on autopilot. Those parents wake up one day to realize they have an “empty nest” and an empty marriage! One of the greatest gifts you can give your children is the security that comes from seeing their parents in a loving, committed marriage. Have the kind of marriage that makes you kids actually want to get married someday!

10. If things aren’t working out in my marriage, I would probably be better off with someone else.

When you face struggles, don’t look for an exit strategy. Don’t fantasize about a life with someone else. Work through your challenges together and you’ll come out stronger on the other side. Remember that a “perfect marriage” is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other!

Kerala is the motherland of people belonging to varied religions, castes and communities. In fact, the Hindu Religions belong to different cultures.Kerala weddings are celebrated with the same fervor everywhere, though their way of conduct is different. Today Online Matrimony play major role Kerala wedding .Intimatematrimony is the best online matrimony in Kerala caste matrimony...

Best Features of a Successful Matrimonial Website...

The sheer reach and convenience of Internet has shrunk the world and brought the reach of everything to one’s finger tips. The access has enabled the evolution of a number of online businesses and one such business is online matrimony. It is one of the online businesses, where the tradition is linked with technology. The increased use of online matrimonial portals is attributed to literal collapsing of conventional family networks, frequent professional movement among the younger generation and the prolific penetration of the Internet.

Though a number of matrimonial websites have mushroomed using dotcom boom and the growth of online banking, only a limited number of them continued to thrive and grow. It is essential to understand what makes such websites successful.

Easy Registration Process

The easy registration process to complete the registration in one go without arduous back tracking is one aspect that attracts increased number of visitors.

User friendly interface:

Users prefer websites that offer user friendly and smooth interface to wade through various options.

Increased choice of profiles:

The ultimate idea of any matrimonial website user is to find their soul mate easily and quickly. The availability of increased number of profiles in every category enables the user such quick option.

Classification of Profiles:

Classification of profiles under appropriate categories such as community, caste, age profession and personal preferences enables a registered user to narrow down his or her options to find their life partner easily.

Level of security:

A successful matrimonial website always cares for the privacy of the registrants. The security options such as photo and profile protection, access permission etc increases the confidence of the registered users.

Profile Matching facilities:

As a facility matrimonial websites have installed horoscope or Horoscope matching software to meet the requirement of the conventional alliance seekers. This feature enables such traditional users and others to narrow down their choice of selection.

Success Stories:

The success of a matrimonial website is often gauged by the number of marriages concluded using the website. The portals encourage such married couples to post their marriage success stories in the website. Such posted stories increase the credibility of a matrimonial website.

Use of other Promotional Vehicles

A majority of the online matrimonial companies make promotions only to increase the database of their registered users. Only a very few companies use their other promotional vehicles such as TV, Magazine and Ground Events to promote the profiles of the users

10 Things To Do For Wedding Planner........

Most of us dream about the perfect wedding and the key to the perfect wedding is an amazing wedding planner. In order to make things easier for you, we have listed down a few things one should keep in mind while choosing a wedding planner.

1. Relevant experience in planning a wedding:

What you are really looking for is if they have experience with the various aspects that you want. For e.g.- Have they done a wedding with a similar venue? Have they previously done the things you want in your wedding? Have they done a wedding as big or as small as yours?

If they have done a wedding at the same venue, it’s bonus points :)

2. Attentiveness of the Wedding Planner

You would probably want to figure out if they will be up to the level of attentiveness that you expect.

How many meetings will you have? What will they handle and what do you have to handle? Will they be present on your wedding day or another member of their team?

This will give you an idea of the help you want to receive and what this wedding planner will offer.

3. Arranging Vendors for Photography, Flowers & Music

Get to the bottom of where all your vendors will come from with this planner.

Do you find them or does your wedding planning have some alliances? Do they get any special discounts?

This will help you to determine the right vendor for the job. Make sure you get the best vendors you want and not just the ones they recommend. A good follow up question would be “Can we pick a vendor you have not worked with before?”

4. Division of Expenditure

If you are selecting a package or signing a contract you will want to see where all the money is going. Ask for a line-item breakdown of expenses. This way you can see if they want to hire an expensive vendor. This gives you a better way to negotiate on prices.

5. Special considerations for Guests

People will come from various places for your wedding. Your wedding planner should help you make a plan on how to handle parking, shuttles, hotels, etc…

This will especially be helpful if you are having your wedding in India and inviting foreign guests. They often need help learning Indian wedding traditions and getting to and from events. They may also need other special considerations.

6. Backup Plans

You will always need backup plans. A good planner will help you make bulletproof plans for you. If you are having an outdoor wedding you will need an indoor alternative in case of bad weather.

You will also need a wedding planner backup plan. Ask your planner what happens if they can not make it on the day of your wedding due to an emergency.

7. Take a Look at their Portfolio

Most planners have their portfolio online now. In case they don’t you will want to ask to see their work.

Make sure it’s what you are looking for in your own wedding. See for yourself if this planner has put on high quality weddings in the past. You don’t want to be surprised.

8. Designing and co-ordination

Some wedding planners do only that. Plan. But if you need them to design the wedding and plan it you will want to ask that up front. Usually, the better wedding planners do both design and coordinate the whole wedding.

9. Executing the plans

If you have an idea of how you want your wedding designed ask them what they think. See if they have ideas on how to execute. If they offer nothing you might want to look somewhere else. You want somebody who will be helpful.

10. Building Trust

You will be spending a lot of time with your planner and taking their advice. If you like them and trust them it will make everything easier.

In conclusion, talk about these things with your wedding planner early. It will be a good start on a path to one of the best days of your life.

Kerala is the motherland of people belonging to varied religions, castes and communities. In fact, the Hindu Religions belong to different cultures.Kerala weddings are celebrated with the same fervor everywhere, though their way of conduct is different. Today Online Matrimony play major role Kerala wedding .Intimatematrimony is the best online matrimony in Kerala caste matrimony...

More Visit :www.intimatematrimony.com

Effective Way to Improve Communication in Your Marriage with Simple Step....

Unfortunately, there is usually so much room for error and misinterpretation with relationship communication. Half listening, talking while the other partner is speaking, making up our own false conclusions, and misinterpreting the words our partners say, are just a few of those bad communication behaviors we need to remove.

We constantly say it’s the most important aspect of any committed partnership, yet so many couples still struggle with actually getting it right. The reason most couples get it wrong is because their definitions of effective communication isn’t all that effective. What they think it should be, isn’t what it is. Some think it’s only about discussing what’s bothering you. We tend to forget that listening, validation and acknowledging are also key parts of a successful relationship dialogue. Being  satisfied with simply sharing your woes won’t work for a marriage whose goal is love, joy and peace.

Once a set of relationship goals are established, couples must put forth every effort to achieve them. Love success is within our reach. It just first begins with how we talk to one another. I am really big on sharing your truth with a delivery that’s loving and thoughtful. Especially when you are discussing a particularly heated topic. Controlling your tongue and expressing yourself clearly are both great beginnings and the most easiest to get a handle on.

In addition, there is one more key ingredient to successful love communication and that is, sharing your why.

Even when we are being vulnerable and sharing what’s hurting us, it’s also important to discuss the why. If our spouse’s were provided a little more insight into our world and understand all those little triggers we carry with us, we’d notice an improvement.

The majority of our frustration comes from us feeling as though our mates just don’t get us. We come to the conclusion that they are either insensitive or we just simply don’t matter enough to them. However, if they knew our why, more often, we’d definitely have better outcomes. Why certain topics are emotional for us, why a behavior causes us to respond negatively and why we struggle in certain situations, are all useful pieces of information our mate should know.

Sharing the “why” during communication with your partner, will assist you in arriving at a solution much quicker and help your spouse better understand you and the reason you’re reacting the way you are. Misinterpretations and poor communication are less likely whenever there is clarity around the “why”.

Intimatematrimony is India’s pioneering online matrimonial service provider, offering best matchmaking services. With ample database of thousands of prospective brides’ and grooms’ matrimony profiles, we assist you to meet with potential life partners and build lifetime relationships

Arranged Marriages in India..

Arranged marriages have always been a debatable subject. It is in the major outlook on relationships that Indians are vastly different, in the way they perceive the institution of marriage, to those beliefs of other countries especially in the west.

Many people have a pretty major misunderstanding of the topic of arranged marriages and in fact have a fairly negative attitude regarding arranged marriages. The best way to understand the reasoning behind such cultures is to put aside your own beliefs, opinions, and preconceived ideas in order to see more clearly before dismissing it as wrong. While it may not be for all and love marriages in India are not unheard of or a rare sighting by any means…arranged marriages aren’t necessarily a bad thing either!

The Acceptance of Arranged Marriages in India

Although most westerners cannot fathom marrying someone they do not love, it is incredibly interesting to note that arranged marriages is not something which is fought against, or a source of protest among the young of India.

The truth, surprisingly, is the exact opposite, many of the youth in India prefer arranged marriages, as it gives them the time and the ability to enjoy their youth without the constant worry and struggle of relationships that comes about in western culture.

The west generally believe that one needs to have live-in relationship or a long courtship before they can get married to know whether they are sexually as well as generally compatible or not. The fact that an arranged marriage is actually preferred in many cases in India, and may even indeed be a healthy and happier form of love than the marriages experienced in the west comes as somewhat of a shock or at least a surprise to most.

Feelings Vs Commitment

Many Indians look at marrying a person they don’t know, gives one “a lifetime to learn to love them”, as opposed to the American ideal of learning a person inside and out before entering into marriage. It can be said that an arranged marriage in India is not based on feelings, but rather on commitment.

An Indian woman described it as “Here, we get married without having feelings for the person. We base our marriage on commitment, not on feelings. As our marriage progresses, the feelings develop. In America, you base your decision to marry on feelings, but what happens when the feelings wane? You have nothing left to keep the marriage together if you get married according to feelings and then the feelings go away.”

Arranged Marriages are Not Forced Marriages

When people think of arranged marriages, they often picture a boy or girl forced into a relationship in which they have absolutely no choice. However, in reality, this is simply not the case, before the marriage becomes official the potential bride and groom have the opportunity to meet each other and decide whether or not a relationship is something that they would wish to pursue. It’s not like the couple see each other on the wedding day for the first time or just once before the wedding. Once approved they meet and get engaged.

There is usually a period of months or even a year or more after the couple are engaged and before the wedding, where the couple get to know each other, meet, talk and discuss the future. This time after the engagement to the wedding day is sort of the dating period for the couple.

Marriages are a Family Affair

A daughter is said to marry into a family in India. Marriage is not perceived as a relationship between two people but as a relationship between families and especially between the girl and her husband’s family. This is mainly due to the fact that many Indians live in joint families where the wives enter into and live with the husbands family. So a family with several sons will have their wives and children all living together in the same house.

What makes this system work in India is a great deal of trust in the choices of one’s parents. It’s the confidence that parents not only love their daughter and have her best interest at heart, but that they also have more wisdom and can make a better decision for her in the area of marriage.

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